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Local Man Buys Eight Slabs Of Mountain Dew For ‘Gaming Cred’ – P1NG

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Gregory Theodore has just left Woolies with eight full slabs of Mountain Dew in his trolley, and nothing else. He will soon be making his way to Coles as Doritos are on special.

When asked what all that was for, Gregory told us that it was all for his solo gaming sessions this weekend.

“I usually drink Coke, but apparently Mountain Dew is the drink of choice of gamers.”

“It’s a ritual of mine to drink Mountain Dew and Doritos during each gaming sesh.”

“I’m scared if I don’t down the Dew I’ll be labelled a Fake Gamer Guy.”

Gregory, who had more zits on his face than a 12 year old boy, suddenly had to run.

“Sorry, nothing personal, I just have the urge to run everywhere, all the time. Most of my gaming sessions are interrupted every 20 minutes for a running and peeing break.”

More to come.

Words by Stefan.
‘P1NG’ logo by Nick.
‘Player One News Gatherers’ (‘P1NG’) is Player One’s Investigative Journalism Unit

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Stefan Bradley
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